So, for those of you who have known me for 5 years or more, you may or may not remember that Stephanie passed away in March of 2003. If you have never tried to figure out how many years it takes for something to happen on it's original day again, it's five years. So Steph passed away on Sunday March 16, 2003 and yesterday was Sunday, March 16th 2008. We made the mistake of coming home before 8 pm last night and having nothing to do, we sat on the couch and I stared at the clock and remember what it was I was doing 5 years ago and that time. It was the worst hour I have experienced in a very long time. I just sat there and stared, and stared at the clock and it seemed to stand still. I began texting my sister to see how the game was going. That helped distract me a little but I still bawled for a good hour or so.
My poor husband, being the good man that he is, sat with me and held me. I kept apologizing because even though I knew him when Steph passed away, he had never met her, so my irrationality was lost on him. But he knew exactly what to say to one of my rants, "Just because I never knew her doesn't mean I don't care."
I guess maybe that is why we have tried to spend the day (or as close to the day as our work schedules allow) together with the people who were there, and who know. But this year, we were all spread out. Mom and Dad were together. Stacie was in GF with Mike and I was flying home alone.
And speaking of flying home alone and having a bad day, I came in at about 4:10. My suitcase is still not here. Because I was having a bad day already, that fact didn't make me any more chipper. Hope you all had a better Sunday than me. I hope they find it by tonight because I don't want do multiple days with no makeup and no coat. I'll keep you all posted.
Monday, March 17, 2008
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